Im gonna say it! If I had known. BEETLEJUICE: Please say yes, please say yes, please say yes, please say yes. And I fear for my safety around you. Because dead or alive, you dont got somebody who really gets you, then youre going to feel lonely and worthless and youll never reach your goal weight because you eat when youre sad this guy knows what Im talking about. MAXINE: See? This sappy subplot robs the musical of macabre and fits the story as well as O.J.'s glove. WE'RE MORE THAN DETRITUS WE'RE FINALLY ALIVE! In her eyes, her ability to "gut" the house is connected to her ability to express, from which Charles is blocking her. CHARLES: I just have to get the chalk. You are never gonna regret this! LYDIA YOU GIVE ME THAT! Love is love. Mmmmmm, yes! THIS IS GONNA BE SO GOOD! I orbit. (an idea.) CHARLES: Delia Schlimmer, will you do me the honor of signing a prenuptial agreement and be my second wife? ADAM: What the heck did they do to our house? Lydia, right now you are redirecting anger and deflecting pain and other terms I learned in my training. My names not Otho! Im ready for some people to die. And now, finally theyre about to die! I never said-, LYDIA: You never say ANYTHING! It has u but doesnt have a me. It didn't work. BEETLEJUICE: WOO! L: I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind. But Lydia, you cant live like this! BARBARA: Thats so strange, Its not hot. Ooohh? I mean you saw these schmucks up here. BARBARA: There are two kinds of people in this world. He was fast! Are you alright? Thank you for being here. Yeah. CHARLES: No, we have to stop. I changed a lot. BEETLEJUICE: Its my middle name. (ADAM kisses BEETEJUICE. Then you will know that I am no longer . Were not like you! Thats great! In a haunted house, all alone! Mr. Juice, I respect your resistance and your Moxy. ADAM: Chapter one! Im going to suck your ghostinto it and trap it there forever!. LYDIA: I dont want your help. LYDIA: Oh. DELIA: Well, Im so happy for all of you. We have two days to make this a model home. ENSEMBLE: Daylight come and we wan' go PASTOR: (spoken) In times like these, we have no words We have only each other Today we come together to mourn the passing of Emily Deetz Devoted wife . BEETLEJUICE: YouareADORABLE (kisses Adam) HA! Beetlejuice - Musical. BEETLEJUICE: Well, it doesnt matter if you say it Adam, THEY HAVE TO BE ALIVE! Once he realizes this house is haunted, well have to leave! BARBARA: Ill make a (a beat.) It's just like you said, you dont always get it, but youre a part of it. We do not want to kill people! CHARLES: Hey! DELIA: SUCKS-YES! I think I really captured your essence. ADAM: You away from her! Yup, thats the one. Barbara! (more chase.) And now this is what you get. Delia, that was just the wind. All ganging up against the mean lady from hell! CHARLES: Im glad you like it. LYDIA: I dont know how! Which does not come easy. Playing hardball, huh? Hi there. (Charles and Delia try a Hi-five) Oh, so close! (THE MAITLANDS nod.) Theyre chasing me! Synopsis: Beetlejuice, a malevolent spirit masquerading as a guide to the Netherworld meets the Maitlands, a recently deceased couple learning the ropes of haunting their own home. beetlejuice baby, when you're toast you're toast and i'm the ghost you're gonna need the most you need a demon who's smart helping you master the art so how 'bout we all make a start on the whole, you know, let's face it mourners (cont'd) dies irae oh so irae dies irae dies irae dies irae ah ah mourners (cont'd) ah ah ah ah ah ah beetlejuice & mourners god i hope you're ready for . Scripture tells us, Sorrow not. CHARLES: Delia, you erotic astronaut! But it seems that Teeter is not content with just wowing audiences on stage. BEETLEJUICE See, this is what life is. LYDIA: Let me get you some cash for those cookies! This is what you get! LYDIA: The ghosts! For decades, there's been talk about making a "Beetlejuice" sequel, but in the early '90s screenwriter Jonathan Gem wrote an entire script for a follow-up (via Far Out Magazine). BEETLEJUICE: Wait, wait, wait COME ON! ADAM: I dont mean her, I mean her family. ADAM: Yeah. DELIA: Oh, shes so stubborn, I just need more time. Were going to play a little game! Its-. JUNO: STOP! About Lydia. CHARLES: Except brains. LYDIA: I want you to stay. "Let's turn on the juice and see what shakes loose.". ADAM: That guy! LYDIA: My whole life is a dark room. Barbara, the pig! You dont like your dad, and I dont like my mom! BARBARA: SURE, THE GROOM CRAWLED OUT OF A TOMB, BARBARA/DELIA: CREEPY OLD GUY, CREEPY OLD GUY, I WANNA SEE A TEAR IN EVERY EYE AS I PASS BY, I KNOW THAT ON THE OUTSIDE HE'S DISGUSTING, BUT I KNOW THAT THIS TIME, I'M MAKIN' IT RIGHT, ALL: HERE COMES THE BRIDE HERE COMES THE BRIDE, I CAN'T BELIEVE SOME CULTURES THINK THIS KIND OF THING'S ALRIGHT, LYDIA: MY CREEPY OLD GUY MY CREEPY OLD GUY. BEETLEJUICE: WHY GOD-SLASH-SATAN, DID YOU SEND THESE BED WETTERS? Lydia: I am alone. Big beautiful brains. EVEN, LIKE, A TAX ATTORNEY WOULD'VE BEEN BETTER, SOMEBODY WITH GRAVITAS SOMEBODY TO FEAR WHO, ADAM: Excuse me, Mr. Beetlejuice we can kind of hear you. Its like a green card thing! All I want is for someone, anyone to look my way and say Hey. But you can. ADAM: And your dad has made some big mistakes with the interior design! And this, this is a business dinner! Beebleboose! Yes book? Youre leaving me? Very good energy. DELIA: Otho, I noticed that the Soulbox is both glowing and making a noise. CHARLES: Oh yes, Lydia, she uh, Im afraid she wont be joining us. The Whole 'Being Dead' Thing - Betelgeuse and Ensemble 3. Now lets hurry up and leave this god forsaken house. DELIA: I dont see race. BEETLEJUICES: ALL WE WANNA DO IS HEAR THAT SOUND. Can everybody see me? BEETLEJUICE: Hi there, ahahaha! LYDIA: We gotta get out of here! By Ben Brantley. CHARLES: Delia! We are invisible. Cmon! From A Chorus Line to You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown, we've got plenty of monologues from musicals to choose from! We invisibles have to stick together! Please, forgive me! PRIEST: In times like these, we have no words, we have only each other. Maybe, we can help each other! Strangers. BEETLJUICE: You know overnight delivery cost extra. I don't know what just happened. This is so wrong, your my employee, but also my lover! DELIA: And that is depressing. Now, to the Prius! (a beat or two.) Adam, wanna do the honors? Ready, Set, Not Yet - Adam . GET OUTTA MY WAY. BEETLEJUICE: No, she did! And life! Is that an old book? Otho : [while Lydia shows them the attic] Fabulous. Based on the 1988 Burton film, this musical delves into the life of oddball teen Lydia Deetz, who meets a recently deceased couple and an unruly demon willing to help them haunt a house. Is that why youre wearing those sheets? Wheres your handbook? Every bit of it. Ive come to pry my beloved daughter from your cold dead hands. Youll have to open the door to find out. (laughs) Hell do it. My guruOtho! We got any kids in the audience? BEETLEJUICE: Uh, wait what? DELIA: SHE IS A HURRICANE IN ALL KINDS OF WEATHER, LYDIA: MAMA IF YOU'RE LISTENING, DOESN'T THIS BLOW YOUR MIND, BUT SEEK A LITTLE STRANGER THAN USUAL AND YOU WILL FIND. If this house is haunted, then that means mom might still be back at our old house! CENSUS AGENT: Hello, I'm with the U.S. Census Bureau, got time for a few, OH MY GOD! . IM TIRED OF TRYIN TO IRON OUT MY CREASES, HE WANTS ME TO SMILE AND CLAP LIKE A PERFORMING SEAL, YOU WONT BELIEVE THE MESS THAT WEVE BECOME, ARE YOU RECEIVING? BEETLEJUICE: Ugh, holy moly, a lot of people come to this house, lights! Both movie and musical have the same bones, yet there are many differences that change everything from minor details to major motivations. Im here to find my-, MISS ARGENTINA: Girl! We used to live here. Beetlejuice:: *stops her* hey i get it you and me were not that different. And choosing the people you wanna share it with! ADAM: Well that wasnt very nice. YAAAH. "Beetlejuice made 'weird' look cool. Thats what I want too. We will just have to do this without her. SPIN! You know what? BEETLEJUICE: Holy crap! I got all the way to Howards store, and then Howard tells me their out of stock. And if not, we're adding more every week so if you don't see one you like, keep checking back! Results may vary. BEETLEJUICE: I am not Wiccan, and that is nothing like this. Its like against the law at my house. After Adam and Barbara realized that Lydia wasn't like the rest of her family, they didn't want Betelgeuse to scare her anymore. Where are you? Id like to meet my fianc, Delia. Im not comfortable withfeelingsyou know that. Do you want some lunch? Do you remember what I said? BARBARA: Lydia, no, you don't know what will happen. We cant just stay in the attic! Theyre made out of the devil! LYDIA: What? BEETLEJUICE: Im tired of being alone! Source: . Its like a nursing home for sad cats. And you heard what he said, any ghost can do that possession stuff. 7 a script for the sequel was commissioned. She was my whole world. CHARLES: -Not good for Lydia. ; Body Horror: Having his head cut off, then stretching his nose out while shoving his hand into the back of his head and growing eyes on his fingers. (Smokes.) The happiness is completely gone, and that just makes me really sad. Maxie Dean loves shrimp! Now normally, I would use a plumbline for this, but Im not too shabby with a freehand. AHAHAHAHA SHUT UP! BEETLEJUICE: Please dont make me beg. Ongoing. BEETLEJUICE: Wow! I dont wanna die! Afraid Id marry her? What if shes possessed? He needs therapy! BARBARA: We are! Oh, speaking of luggage, have you met my fourth wife? All of us! Goes to the door. Oh god, Im so worried now. BEETLEJUICE: ZOOBY DOOBY DOOBY, DOOBY DOP AND BOW! You give mea bonerhere, its a femur. But what if it doesnt last? ADAM: Hang on. Dad theres ghosts! Stupid sheet!, (Ad lib.). Ages 12-17: Camp Broadway Ensemble @ Carnegie Hall. Gain full access to show guides, character breakdowns, auditions, monologues and more! This is not working out. Oh God, how I missed that sound. BEETLEJUICE: Well make it snappy, I WANT CAKE! Its okay at Christmas, but the rest of the year, you gotta put it away! Which reminds me, I got you a new dress for your fathers business dinner! ", AND SHE'LL BE LIKE "OH, NOTHIN' JUST RUNNING THE WORLD.". Beetlejuice the Musical - Prologue: Invisible Lyrics "Prologue: Invisible" is a song performed by Sophia Anne Caruso (Lydia) from the musical Beetlejuice. And yet, I worry. LYDIA: In my vision, my dad and I are back in our old house in New York. ADAM: The electoral college! ITS ALMOST A GIVEN THAT I WILL ALL SOON BE ALIVE. Oh you dont have a handbook? Ive learned a lot. 119. Beetle..(bj covers her mouth) BJ: She's a little nervous. See ya suckers! LYDIA: Then Ill find a way to do it myself. She held her lip between her teeth and went to find him at once. Welcome to our model home. Keep it away from your sensitive parts. DELIA: Its like my guru Otho always says, If you dont take a chance, you dont have a chance, because you didnt take it!. And other terms I learned in my vision, my dad and I are in... To Howards store, and that is nothing like this have no words, we no. 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